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| People and Their Weird Habits of Examining Produce. |
 May 19 2012, 09:14 PM
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#1
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 Ding Dong, man.  Posts: 18,619 Joined: 15-March 07 I Don't Like: unions  |
Was just doing some shopping (aw yeah, Saturday night - still single, ladies!) and I think the more you go on off hours, the more you see some really weird people. There was a guy opening multiple boxes of raspberries and seemingly examining each individual berry (not touching, thankfully, just looking), before not deciding to buy any. There was another lady tossing peaches up in the air like baseballs, not sure what that was meant to accomplish.
I don't think I do anything weird. I examine all of the chunks of cut parmiggiano to choose the one with the least amount of wax backing. That's not weird, is it? Let's hear some, I'm sure people here have some real doozies. This post has been edited by Mike B.: May 19 2012, 09:17 PM -------------------- Y'all laying up, doing shit. Nahmean, playing whatever little volleyballs they got on the beach and doing everything, the activities.
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May 19 2012, 09:19 PM
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#2
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 EtymoloJesus Posts: 28,242 Joined: 15-March 07 I Like: Max the Knight I Don't Like: Garbage-eating enemies |
I quiz my berries on currant events.
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May 19 2012, 09:25 PM
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#3
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EtymoloJesus Posts: 28,242 Joined: 15-March 07 I Like: Max the Knight I Don't Like: Garbage-eating enemies |
I throw two coconuts into an otherwise empty shopping cart, then run laps around the store cornering as hard as I can. First coconut to crack comes home.
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May 19 2012, 09:39 PM
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#4
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Ding Dong, man. Posts: 18,619 Joined: 15-March 07 I Don't Like: unions |
I test the elasticity of the kaiser rolls by mashing them with my fist (covered in a bag, of course). I only buy the ones that retain at least 85% of their original shape.
-------------------- Y'all laying up, doing shit. Nahmean, playing whatever little volleyballs they got on the beach and doing everything, the activities.
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May 19 2012, 09:41 PM
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#5
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EtymoloJesus Posts: 28,242 Joined: 15-March 07 I Like: Max the Knight I Don't Like: Garbage-eating enemies |
I scream at the lobster tank. Whichever lobster flinches comes home - jittery lobsters have the most tender meat.
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May 19 2012, 09:45 PM
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#6
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Ding Dong, man. Posts: 18,619 Joined: 15-March 07 I Don't Like: unions |
I throw the tomatoes on the vine as hard as I can at the ceiling. The ones that stick are the tastiest, but unfortunately you obviously can't buy those.
-------------------- Y'all laying up, doing shit. Nahmean, playing whatever little volleyballs they got on the beach and doing everything, the activities.
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May 19 2012, 10:09 PM
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#7
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 SWBAT: Posts: 7,235 Joined: 29-July 08 From: Dalton, Massachusetts I Like: Henrik Lundqvist I Don't Like: The Boston Red Sox |
QUOTE(Sed @ May 19 2012, 10:19 PM)  I quiz my berries on currant events.  
-------------------- Home Plate Beer Kings Hockey Motto: "Win or lose we drink the booze!"
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May 19 2012, 10:39 PM
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#8
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 Member Posts: 2,890 Joined: 20-March 07 From: Laguna Beach & Santa Rosa, CA I Like: The Minitrue I Don't Like: The Komsomol |
Three tomatoes are walkin' down the street.
Papa Tomato, Mama Tomato and Baby Tomato. Baby Tomato starts lagging behind, and Papa Tomato gets really angry. Goes back and squishes him and says: "Ketchup." |
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May 19 2012, 10:43 PM
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#9
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EtymoloJesus Posts: 28,242 Joined: 15-March 07 I Like: Max the Knight I Don't Like: Garbage-eating enemies |
I always get uneasy walking down the ethnic foods aisle at night.
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May 19 2012, 11:41 PM
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#10
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 If u read this,u're a moron! U just read this,didnt u? Posts: 19,243 Joined: 15-March 07 From: South Florida I Like: Dr. Ben Carson |
I yell at tomatos when they are looking pruney and just staring me down.
Yes, i am single too. Not to mention calling them fucking commies as well. This post has been edited by Hockey101: May 19 2012, 11:42 PM --------------------  |
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May 19 2012, 11:57 PM
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#11
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 Member Posts: 2,493 Joined: 21-March 07 |
I tells my grocer "Hey, the lettuce looks wilted".
He says "That Romaine's to be seen". --- (My puns are hard to Beet) --- -------------------- [attachment=7772:boehner_gavel.jpg] |
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May 20 2012, 12:05 AM
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#12
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Member Posts: 2,493 Joined: 21-March 07 |
When shopping for my legumes, I open up a bag and throw some Peas on Earth.
-------------------- [attachment=7772:boehner_gavel.jpg] |
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May 20 2012, 12:53 AM
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#13
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 Deal with it. Posts: 7,648 Joined: 1-December 07 From: New York |
-------------------- 5-hole.com
“I couldn’t believe how loud it was. Much louder than the Verizon Center.” - Capitals defenseman Jeff Schultz on Madison Square Garden QUOTE(bloodorange @ Nov 11 2012, 11:13 AM) Butt sex is offended by this thread. |
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May 20 2012, 01:40 AM
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#14
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If u read this,u're a moron! U just read this,didnt u? Posts: 19,243 Joined: 15-March 07 From: South Florida I Like: Dr. Ben Carson |
QUOTE(ThunderDawg @ May 20 2012, 12:57 AM) I tells my grocer "Hey, the lettuce looks wilted". He says "That Romaine's to be seen". --- (My puns are hard to Beet) --- +100!!!-------------------- |
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May 20 2012, 02:11 AM
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#15
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 Death's Grim Herald Posts: 6,685 Joined: 15-March 07 From: Over the Hill I Like: New York in June, How 'bout you? I Don't Like: Mondays. |
I like to envision whirled peas.
-------------------- "Hey, you kids!! Get off my lawn!!!!"
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May 20 2012, 07:43 AM
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#16
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 This Space for Rent Posts: 4,477 Joined: 15-March 07 From: 6 months outside of downtown 40 I Don't Like: Florida |
QUOTE(Sed @ May 19 2012, 10:19 PM) I quiz my berries on currant events. I thought you had to be named Dan to quiz-them-berries. -------------------- |
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May 20 2012, 10:06 PM
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#17
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 sweet + tender hooligan Posts: 3,359 Joined: 21-March 08 From: Brooklyn I Like: cheerful anarchism I Don't Like: kyriarchy |
Eric. and Sed.
-------------------- QUOTE(hd2ddkeds @ Mar 15 2011, 07:29 AM) tag name of love hearts the world is doomed QUOTE(Hockey101 @ Nov 19 2012, 03:48 PM) What a smart mathematician. What a whimsical creature you are. |
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May 20 2012, 10:24 PM
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#18
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EtymoloJesus Posts: 28,242 Joined: 15-March 07 I Like: Max the Knight I Don't Like: Garbage-eating enemies |
I bring one of those pool pH test kits with me, crack open a container of half-and-half, and "test" it. I then make a point of getting all dramatic about the "results."
No - this can't be! *gets on cell phone - dials* Get me CDC IMMEDIATELY - it's FAR worse than we thought. -------------------- |
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May 21 2012, 06:48 AM
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#19
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Is too busy toiling in the fields to paint a beard and straw hat Posts: 1,603 Joined: 16-March 07 From: Toiling in the fields... I Like: Toiling in the fields I Don't Like: Having stones cast at him |
Two melons are very much in love, but they are very sad...
They cantaloupe. --------------------  |
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May 21 2012, 01:31 PM
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#20
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 Ask me about my heath hen. Posts: 11,158 Joined: 15-March 07 From: Plowing your fields I Like: Sheep I Don't Like: The World Wide Web |
Puns aside, I like to grab a banana, stick it down my pants, turn to the nearest female patron and say, "Does this banana make my dick look big?"
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May 21 2012, 02:19 PM
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#21
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 Member Posts: 20,939 Joined: 15-March 07 From: Boston, MA I Like: Nyquil I Don't Like: Dayquil |
I go to the produce section and pretend to be looking elsewhere while making butt muscles, then I quickly bring my gaze back to the vegetables and see which ones are checking me out. Those are the ones I know want to go home with me.
-------------------- RIP Ass Dan, 1981-2010.
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May 21 2012, 02:51 PM
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#22
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sweet + tender hooligan Posts: 3,359 Joined: 21-March 08 From: Brooklyn I Like: cheerful anarchism I Don't Like: kyriarchy |
this thread is so fucking weird.
-------------------- QUOTE(hd2ddkeds @ Mar 15 2011, 07:29 AM) tag name of love hearts the world is doomed QUOTE(Hockey101 @ Nov 19 2012, 03:48 PM) What a smart mathematician. What a whimsical creature you are. |
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May 22 2012, 10:59 AM
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#23
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Member Posts: 2,493 Joined: 21-March 07 |
I like to test walnuts by cracking them between my butt cheeks.
-------------------- [attachment=7772:boehner_gavel.jpg] |
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Lo-Fi Version | Time is now: 18th June 2013 - 12:07 AM |